Sunday, December 27, 2009

2 AM

well, almost
but I really don't want to go to sleep
I want to play
or maybe read
My eyes are getting a little heavy
but I don't want to waste a minute of my own time

It seems like every day is very scheduled
and regimented and pre-determined and planned
(you get the idea)
I have very a precise time schedule

Even with being late most days - about 7 minutes every morning -
because it's hard to wind my internal clock -

but every day I hit the alarm clock at the same time, drink my tea at the same time, drag myself to the shower at the same time, rush to the car at the same time, etc, etc, etc... so I'm supposed to always get to bed at the same time, so I can wake up on time...

...boring...

but now, it's vacation time.
So. If I decide to stay up all night long, looking at you-tube videos of people playing covers of rock songs on the violin.
What difference will it make?

Tomorrow, I will wake up late - maybe even after 9, and then drink three big cups of tea right in a row.


I really don't mind work. I like my job and the people I work with.
I just hate the fact that my life is no longer free.
But like Thor says, that's why they call it a job.
So I'll "suck it up." usually.
But not tonight.

4 comments:

Seraphine said...

we are all slaves to something: eating, using the toilet, betrothed to some person, function or occupation. day follows night, even without a clock to verify the passage of time. and we all discover, one day, there was never enough time.
we are slaves to ourselves, our wants, yearnings and dreams. we are slaves to the earth.
slave and mistress share small distinction.

Sue said...

Sera, you are so right, and so poetic :) I guess that even in my old life, with no job, I did still have to often bow to outside forces and pressures, and in fact I often felt a little directionless, which wasn't good... but I look back at that time now with rose colored glasses...

Vincent said...

That's life! So next time someone asks you what is life all about, you know how to answer him or her! :-)

Sue said...

Vincent - thank goodness that life includes holidays! :)