Sunday, May 10, 2009

The Mothers Day update

So some of you know that last year,my Mothers Day was not too good. In fact, the boys -- who are old enough to know better -- didn't pay too much attention to me or to the day. And Thor wasn't feeling well (I forget what was wrong) so he didn't take up the slack like he normally would. I felt like the boys, at 15 and 17, should have been able to handle it without their father (and I) telling them what to do.

I didn't expect or want or need expensive gifts. I did want them to act like they appreciated me.

So last year I threw a huge tantrum because my feelings were hurt. And I've reminded them several times during the course of this year that they had better be more caring this year. I used a yellow highlighter to mark the calendar. I couldn't have been more obvious.

So today, I woke up pretty early. Thor made me bacon and eggs and tea and I watched CBS Sunday Morning. I received two text messages saying Happy Mothers Day from Frankie -- one from 12:01 AM last night, and one this morning. Frankie had spent the weekend at the beach, and he arrived home by 9:30 AM. (Nick was asleep still.)

Frankie asked me if I wanted my present, and I said yes -- AFTER we spent some time together! :) So he watched a girly movie with me all morning, and folded socks... (Nick was still asleep.)

Nick had told me he was going to cook me breakfast or lunch. But Nick was still asleep, so I made myself tuna. Beth stopped in for a while to chat and drop off my sunglasses...and Nick woke up. At 1:30.

We went over to Thor's parents house for a while to visit; my own mom got a phone call, and I told her what her present is... but I won't see her for a while. (My poor mom doesn't get enough attention from me, either. Hi mom, I love you!)

So then, I tortured my family all afternoon. All four of us went and picked out veggies for the garden (a few tomatoes, a japanese eggplant, a butternut squash, a cucumber.) We went shopping at the mall and ate dinner at Five Guys Burger and Fries, and when I wanted chocolate both boys ran and got me chocolate, and Nick (who still hadn't gotten me a gift) bought me a teakettle I liked on sale at Fortunoff. We went food shopping and they had to help and lift all the heavy things and bag and load the car and carry the groceries in. Then, at home, Frankie gave me my gift from him - a sponge bob card, and a nice bar caddy with wine glasses, shot glasses, and drink glasses. It's very nice and I like it a lot.

They did a good job redeeming themselves. Well, Frankie was over-acting it a little, and I think he was making fun of me, but that's fine. And Nick was still a little under-acting it, but he's only 16; he's going to need to do better next year. But I'm sure he will.

I am a little embarassed that I had a tantrum last year. But I guess it worked! :)

So that was my Mother's day this year.


Anonymous said...

Bottom line is most men don't get it. Young or old. It isn't the money spent.. well sometimes it is, but usually it is the thought. So for my birthday... every year since 1997, my inlaws never remembered. Not a call not a card nothing. Not even a "happy birthday" even when I said my birthday was coming up. But my husband always remembered...cause I reminded him. Now that we aren't married I don't expect him to buy me a present, but I do expect him to assist my son get something.. I expect I should do the same for him. This has also been discussed. I didn't remind him this year it was my birthday coming up. So guess who didn't help my son. But, I made an off handed comment a week before Mothers day... I said look you don't hafta take the boy shopping if you don't want to, but please at least tell me so my parents can. So for mothers day he was shamed, I guess, into taking him shopping. I got a gift card for Sears. And a wind thing. (don't know what else to call it) But ya know what... it wasn't the gifts that made the most impression on me, or made me happy. It was that he took him shopping. It wasn't the gift card (although nice).. it was the unexpected phone call from my ex wishing me a happy mothers day (when I know he really didn't want to).... it was the text message from an old friend wishing me happy mothers day, (even though I know he has alot on his plate.).. It was the extra snuggle, and hug I got this morning from my son. It was the thoughts that counted.

Sue said...

Exactly. I would rather not get a gift, IF there was some thought and effort put into it. Sometimes a gift is just too easy and still doesn't mean anything.

I'm glad you had a good day... and I'm glad your old friend called :)